One legged bouncer

That's our shorty! Not only did we put him in the contraption cockeyed, but his toes barely touch. He's figured out how to work it though, despite the odds stacked against him.

One Legged Bouncer from Sara Martin on Vimeo.

Am I Crazy?

Nursing my son has not always been the most trouble-free process, shall we say... More on my end than his. He had a wonderful latch from the start along with the suction of a tornado, but after nearly 5 weeks of life outside of the womb, that peanut just wasn't getting enough of the good stuff. If you remember his one month pictures that were posted back in September, his newborn onesie was baggy over his loose, wrinkled skin :( I'll never forget the day when the lactation consultant weighed him and he was under his birth weight- at five weeks old! When she walked out of the room and all I could do was cry and tell those big eyes how sorry I was. So sorry.

So after weeks of pumping, consuming extra calories, drinking Mother's Milk tea and pounding herbal supplements, we finally saw an increase, but not quite enough. Insert Similac. We came back from the lactation consultant with a bag full of formula and I could barely look at it. I felt like a failure as a mom and a woman; I couldn't provide for my baby. And not only did I feel like a disappointment to my child, but to my husband who had definitely not budgeted for having to buy formula. Even though I was still going to nurse and just use the formula as a supplement, there was nothing more heart breaking than that hungry cry of frustration when Asher was desperately trying to get something that wasn't there. I could go on about the ridiculous things I had to endure and the many times I swore I was done with breastfeeding, but that's a whole other story.

For night feedings I nurse exclusively, meaning I don't mess around with preparing bottles. But now that Asher is really finding a rhythm with his sleep pattern, there is but one time he awakes to be fed. This is a joy considering that for the longest time he was programmed to wake up every 3 hours, but part of me mourned as I thought of the soon-to-be absence of these midnight meetings. There is nothing better than that chubby hand reaching heavenward to find my chin, my cheeks, my nose. Those sweet, contented sighs as though there's nothing more relaxing, more satisfying, than being with momma in this how-God-made-it-to-be kind of way. Then he nestles into me, searching for slumber as we rock into eternity. All of this in the orange glow casted from the night light as everything around us is soft and sleeping.

So am I crazy to think I'll miss awaking each night, in the middle of the night? All for an after hours rendezvous? Maybe, just maybe. But maybe the only thing that I'm really crazy for is the way the Maker has made me to love and connect with my son.

6 Months

Yep, that's halfway to a year. 6 months last Friday. Just keeps gettin' better!



Pics from last month here.

Happy Valentine's Day

Here are some special V-day treats that I made to spread the love. Were you lucky enough to get some? Either way, you really might want to consider making them. 3 grams of protein in each one! I won't mention the grams of fat, but when eating something like this, it really shouldn't even be a consideration.


Here's how it's done:

Ingredients
1 cup creamy peanut butter, divided
4 Tbs. butter, softened
1/2 cup confectioners sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 cups (12 ounces) semisweet chocolate chips
4 milk chocolate candy bars (1.55 ounces each), coarsely chopped
Colored sprinkles, optional
Directions
With an electric mixer, combine 1/2 cup peanut butter, butter, confectioners' sugar and salt until smooth; set aside.
In a microwave, melt the chocolate chips, candy bars and remaining peanut butter; stir until smooth.
Drop teaspoonfuls of chocolate mixture into paper-lined miniature muffin cups. Top each with a scant teaspoonful of peanut butter mixture; top with another teaspoonful of chocolate mixture. Decorate with sprinkles if desired. Refrigerate until set. Store in an airtight container. Yield: 3 dozen.

Melt Your Heart

So the Martin family was way into the Super Bowl this year as Ben is a big Saints/Drew Brees fan. He has a thing for rooting for the underdog. Anyway, I think this clip epitomizes Ben's love for football and his son. (and it's gotta be the most precious NFL moment EVER) Love the headphones!

A Touch of Spring

I'm sure I'm not the only one dying for warmer weather, but these flowers are helping me get a taste of it! I grew them from a kit I got for my bday (from a lovely friend) and planted them in this glass wall hanger Ben got me for Christmas. There were just little bulbs to begin with but they're growing fiercely everyday. Until I can dig my hands into some soil in a few months, I'll be enjoying these from my living room.

Excess

I feel like I've always noticed just how many "things" we have, but in light of the economy and especially since the earthquake in Haiti, my "things" have been magnified; by like, ten thousand. I notice it all the time now: sitting at Panera with a steaming coffee, orange juice and french toast bagel in a warm and clean atmosphere complete with music humming in the background. Can you imagine how a Haitian might look at that? A breakfast fit for a king! At home with a book, a chi tea latte and a dark mocha almond Kashi granola bar. Luxuries beyond compare! Then I look around at all of Asher's bright, shiny new toys, clothes, you name it. I read an article in Mothering magazine about a couple who decided not to register for their baby-to-be. They instead asked for exclusively second hand items. Sure there were many who were confused and inconvenienced by this somewhat extreme notion, but part of me wished we had done something similar.

At the Brookside office we don't get too many phone calls, but when we do, many are from folks who are in need. Normally we don't know these people so we try to hear about their situation a bit and decided what kind of help we can or cannot give from there. Last week "Brittany" called. Kevin (our pastor) had filled up her gas tank earlier in the week and now she was asking if we could help her out with food. As I was talking to her I could hear a baby in the background. She was nine months old and mom couldn't believe the amount of food a child that size and age could eat. I asked Brittany if she ever tried making her own baby food since it's much more cost effective. She hadn't and didn't know how to without a food mill or processor. Of course, with the excess in my home, I had both an electric and a manual food mill. We made arrangements for Brittany to come pick up a gift card and a food mill. Little did she know that she was in for much more than a food mill! Among the baby excess we have accumulated, I came up with unused bottles, diaper cream, infant medicine, baby wash and lotion, even a few jars of baby food. I prayed that she wouldn't be insulted by me trying to shove off all of this on her, and she wasn't. I explained to her how God had really blessed us with friends and family who gave us all of these things. All she could do was reply, "I wish we were." As she left I tried my best to squeeze in some words of encouragement, but I know what she needed was more than a pat on the shoulder and a temporary fix. She needs a relationship with the God who created her, who has a plan for her, who cares and wants to provide for her, to give her hope in the everlasting and not things that fade away.

I wrestled with God that day. How is this fair? That someone just a few miles away, in the same town, same life scenerio, be scraping around while I live my life in excess? Maybe it's one of those things we're not to have full understanding of. Maybe it's meant to inspire me to live life differently, or to inspire you. Either way, we're both aware now. And awareness can be the beginning of something, anything...